Women: From Our Own Worst Critics To Flaunting Our Best

Ladies! (Gentlemen, too, but since today is International Women’s Day, I need to give a special shoutout to all my sisters, nunas and baby girls out there).

I know how hard it is to be a confident woman in the age of filters and plastic surgery. If you want to read about all my physical insecurities, just click here.

The other day, I was commenting on how my height (I’m 1.79 m, or 5ft11) has been a blessing and a curse throughout my life. However, in that conversation, I skipped over the blessings and talked about the mean comments from other men and women, my bad posture as a teen, feeling unfeminine, being deemed undateable by men both short and tall (hello, reverse-Napoleon complex!), lamented my lack of heel-wearing to complete elegant outfits…

When my mother, a woman par excellence, got really annoyed.

“Why don’t you focus on the good!” she exclaimed. “You have incredibly long legs, you’re elegant, lean, you don’t need heels to stand out, you MODEL, those who say you are too tall – no, they’re just too short!” (Bear in mind, she’s only 1.67 m/5ft5.5, but has lived vicariously through her unexpectedly tall daughter! 😀 )

I was defensive, realizing my height would forever determine a large part of my identity, often in ways that I may, honestly, never quite like or fully accept. But after letting my mom’s words sink in a bit, I realized:

I am my own worst critic.

*Raise your hand if you feel me.*

Oh wow, 3.5 billion hands just went up!

We women are notoriously unforgiving with ourselves. My friend with the killer jawline thinks her face is too long. My girl with a face like a greek goddess feels bad about her athletic (and awesome) build from time to time. On my off days, I think I’m too tall, too lanky, too blah blah blah and not XYZ enough. But each of us has stuff to love. Sometimes we make ourselves so damn hard to love. Life is hard. How can we make our self-love easy… or easier?

It may never be easy, but I know we can use our style as a way to highlight and embrace what we love most about ourselves. Forget “hiding” your so-called flaws. Highlight your best.

So in this post, I wore thigh-high boots in my favorite beige color to accentuate my legs, a comfy urban hoodie because the hip hop fan in me will never die, a curve-hugging skirt because my Shakira-like hips make dancing that much more sensual, and an undone hair and virtually no-makeup look because I’m still young and blessed with pretty good skin and mixed-girl wavy hair which, as much as it tangles, I secretly do love a lot. I feel more comfortable with no or very little makeup during the day. Seriously, daylight is harsh.

Now, this whole concept of embracing and focusing on my favorite features is foreign to me – I’m used to critiquing, not embracing – but I thought I’d give the opposite a try. To be honest, I felt both badass and a little more self conscious. As a tall woman, when you accentuate your look, you tend to draw quite a bit of attention, and I usually dress down and wear no eyecatching make up or clothing because I want to remain as incognito as possible. But then I think about the wise words of every diva out there: “If you got it, flaunt it!” It’s not easy, it’s a muscle you have to train – but it’ll be easier if we train together. Let’s be feature-flaunting workout buddies, yes? I urge you all to give your favorite features a chance to shine, let me know what you do to enhance your best, and I’ll be here to run on the road of self-love right next to you – in my killer boots, because life’s too short to hide linguine-long legs, right?  😀

Boots: Navyboot. Skirt: Zara. Crop Hoodie: Brandy Melville. Main Earrings: Modern Citizen Make up: Sensai powder SPF 15, “Better Than Sex” Mascara, Sugar Lip Balm in Rose SPF 15

Images by my boo V  – check out her blog at Sour Cherry Couture ❤

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My warmest embrace!




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